Ponder and P0nder

life today was sucks . except for the dinner and the slacking part . is heaven trying to play me again ? Olvl coming !!! i cant repeat the same mistake again !! well , today yixiang got caught by shanmugam and zul for hair . then was sent back home . hais . today class photo dun have him ! wat a waste . then was also asked to cut and now is like damn short =.= . zzzzzz . crap . but ok larhhs , BEAR WITH IT ! 3 and half more months we will be free ! have to cherish this moment with them . really scared after secondary we will become strangers liao . dun think will barhhs =) hahas ! JYJYJYJY

moody

to my close friends . really sorry for today ! i dont meant to =( . after skool today , i really dunno wat got into me . just get damn so pissed with everything and started emo-ing . just felt that im so useless . for even that small and tivial things . hais . starting from english . i realised im so weak and suck in summary . javier could finish planning and the summary within 50mins but why i cant ?!!! ARGGGHX ! stupid isint it ? just felt that fuck up and useless . then after english going for lunch , my heart suddenly damn pain when walking to canteen and when eating noodle . but i endured so as not to let u all worry that why i call u all dun disturb me . but , why am i so weak and useless ?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sorry for letting u all worry . and to chenjun , really sorry for calling u fuck off . i dont meant to .. just dun want u all to know about it so i tried to endure the pain . but it seems that it worsen the situation . sorry MY FRIENDS !! T.T

PS : STOP IT ! DUN MAKE ME IGNORE YOU AND I REALLY DUN WISH THAT WE COULDNT EVEN BE FRIENDS !

SICK

feel like going to die le ! knn . damn giddy and feel like vomiting the whole day . maybe bcos of insufficient slp :X ystd decided go buangkok to play basketball again . so after dnt went home to bathe and change . reach there arnd 7.50 and met up with cj, yq, and jiunn tat . then went to basketball court and she came down . then da sao and yixiang they all jiu come le . been waiting for the whole night for the auntie and uncle to kp us . lols . here come the funny part . zhun zhun again the same time , 10.25 , the 2nd floor auntie open the window and look at us . then his husband jiu say can stop playing , is 10+ le . tomorrow got work . wahahahahas ! the same line again . knn . then dean say give us one more hour please , mei nu(pretty woman) . i was ike feel like puking la . i slammed the basketball loudly then here comes the heat part . the uncle threatened to call police then yixiang say call la . then call him diam . LOL . then dean say sorry . then i shout aloud . knn . u say sorry for wat . lols . the uncle took out his phone and try to take picture of us ! scary isint ? then i use my handphone and take his picture but v. blur . then i say , uncle dun waste ur time la , my handphone 8 megapixel cant even see ur face clearly and u try to use ur handphone and take us . then he was like talking on the phone and we scared liao . LOL . when we walking away the north vista gang go kp them using vulgarities . damn funny ! still show him their butt . then go slack then jiunn tat saw police then he shout MA DA LAI LIAO . then he run . LOL . jermyn and zankai they all all run sia . cj and da sao and kevin pretend walk away . then i still go ask the police wat happened . then he guailan me back . say dun ask so much . call u quiet u jiu quiet . then i LL walk away . damn guailan . then went kopitiam eat and bought 1 small cake for juinn liang . celebrated for him in a romantic way . lols . bet he is touch ! k la . thats all . going slp le . if not sick i jiu die le .

looking forward to tomorrow

OMG . time really flies eh . tomorrow is Friday le ! 几开心一下喔 ! well , had been lazy to post lately . yesterday took the listening comprehension . somehow feel that i will suck in it . keep falling aslp ! HAIS . hahas , thanks ! i will cheerup de =D . hahas . after listening compre ystd , went for dnt awhile then went rivervale plaza eat and had kfc . wasted 1 piece of chicken and medium pepsi T.T lols . then went buangkok and played basketball :) hahas , then she came down and give me the bball . played till 10+ then she came dwn and play . damn funny , when they play till half , got 1 auntie call them can dun play alrdy . alrdy 10+ . then dean guailan her . then her husband come and say can u all stop playing ? u are disturbing me and i tomorrow got work . lols . then i say uncle u are also disturbing me now . LOL . then yixiang call him tiam la . then he threaten to call police then yixiang say call la . omg , arent we mean ? the uncle sure ELL ! then after that when going back i shout UNCLE BYE BYE ! GOODNIGHT ! lols . damn joke . then reached hom around 11+ and watched the eclipse . damn nice ! moon block the sun =D then help her look for contextual knowledge source . but she fell aslpt . zzzzzzzz . well for today . nothing much happened so would not talk about it . going jogging le ! BB !

GCE LISTENING COMPRE !

lols . havent been posting tis few days cos too busy , nv use computer . dakara , also nothing much to post . well , lets talk about sunday . went to watch harry potter and had sakae sushi for lunch . then went to my auntie house bcos my uncle bday . played with 5 dogs ! so damn cute larhhs . then at there revise abit for SS . lols . the topic i guessed actually came out during monday . so heng ^^ . then ystd went to buangkok and eat dinner with kevin and yixiang they all . studied history and borrowed bball from mabel . then played bball and slack till 11 . tdy nothing much happened . went compass and had mac for dinner with joey and ashley they all . so long nv eat mac and its really nice =D .. lols . seems boring right . k shall stop here . by the way , GOODLUCK FOR EVERYONE TAKING CHINESE OLVL LISTENING COMPREHENSION !

mood : sad

hais . things happen the same as last week . really dunno why . wake up at 6.30 at met ashley , yixiang and dean for breakfast at buangkok b4 gg to history . then after history went to rm and eat breakfast again . so just reach home . later going out study again and at night got dinner . wat the hell ! forget about it .... its impossible ehs ?

jogging a day kick the worries away

lols . just came back from jogging . kinda like addicted to it . although its tiring and sometime will feel breathless , but i like that kind of feeling . sounds weird . lols nvm . jogged to rivervale mall then jogged back to jalan kayu again and had a cup of DINOSAUR ! WAHHH ! SHIOK MAN ! but pity the one sitting beside me , cause maybe i stink :X hahas ! ended the compass spree today as kevin and clarance had tuition . hais . monday ss test . 5 chapter . OMG . crap la . only studied 1 chapter nia . zzzz . still got maths worksheet and chemistry pratical notes need to study and physics revision paper . so fast term 3 le . hais . 5+ more week to prelim !! JY !


PS : should i or shouldnt i ?

moodless

why must you do that ? u dun need to nor had to . maybe apologising doesnt help much . but perhaps that the most i could do isint it ? stop doing such foolish thing please !!! just cant bear it to see you hurt because of something that is not ur fault . its all my fault . im bastard , a real bastard... ok ?! for abadoning you and hurt you . please . i beg you T.T . u are making me losing all my confidence . i really hope u could carry on strongly !!! i know you can know a better guy then me . olvl is around the corner . i really dun wish to see you ruining ur future for me . we werent meant to be together at the 1st place . but im really happy to be with you , u make me feel loved for and cared for . but now it isint that simple anymore . it's complicated then i could imagine . sorry ...... is the last word i could say . silly girl , stay strong .


PS : CAN I ? MAYBE NOT . i really cant do it . i tried to for today but it failed . hais . wat should i do ??

MATHS CRAZE

finally understood wat mr ong mean by gear 4 . was flooded by maths prelim paper today . 7 sets . wat the fuck man . was like damn pissed today . dunno why i just didnt manage to control my temper and exploded . just cant control . wateva . had SS seq test today . should be ok barhhs ^^
next week got ss ct sia . 8 chapter that means 2 book have to study . wtf ? zzzzzz still got maths paper .

pratice make perfect

wahahahahas ! damn happy today . dunno why also . lols . maybe cos im not bored in class .. had EL CT for today . well , guess i could pass ? follow by history seq test , 2 seq . guess could at least get L4 too cos the last test i failed :X 1st time in my life . seq gt 2 and 3 marks . JOKE ! then is chinese listening comprehension . lols . LIAO LAO SHI obviously dun care . when tick finish le i still read eng newspaper infront of her . LOL . then i got 16/20 . 2 wrong due to carelesness . then went to spc and bought oolong tea . for my lunch :X . following was maths remedial . did PAPER 1 within 1.5hr and managed to pass it with 60+ percent . CONTINUE PRATICE !!! WOOOOT !! i see HOPE =D=D=D !! wahahahahas . dunno why ... too happy liao . lols . oh ya . went to eat dinner at KFC with clarance , yixiang , jermyn , dean and juinn liang . had some talk and went back home after that . WAHAHAHAHAHAS ! BB ^^ WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE !

zzzzzzz

its sunday again . hais . tmr again skool . so fast and it going to be olvl . OMG ! hais . havent been posting this ystd due to laziness and something happen :X lols . ystd went buangkok to eat with kevin after dnt . then called yq and darryl wanna play basketball anot . thrashed ppl 1st match but lost in the 2nd . then went to 188 to meet clarance , yixiang and co to play basketball again . it was like rain le then stop . then rain again . heres the funny part ! i clarance and dean went to RM buy things then came back saw yixiang and yongquan damn dulan . then realise the ppl who played basketball ppl guailan then . then yongquan call his bro and his friends come . LOL . and here come the ah beng's . tot there will be shows but nothing happen except they scold them with vulgarities and at there smoke . went home at around 11.30 and took cab home with yixiang and juinn liang . that's all . hahas =D . ARRRRRGHHHHX !!!!!! I WANT TO GROW FATTER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LESSER WORRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT !!!!!!!


PS : are u angry ? sorry

FRIDAY BLUE

felt so sian today . although its friday . but okay la . it was'nt that boring this morning and throughout the day cos theres something to look forward to . hahas . today PE won chenjun badminton today by 1 ball . so he treated me MILO . then went punggol plaza at SUKI SUSHI eat . GST + service charge $10+ . knn !! then came back saw da sao and her at bus stop . she gg home bathe then go out . then came back chiong dnt agn . but in the end , 1 box crack . WTF . had to redo . FUCK ! then ended up slacking while waiting ah john to cut the material . sian 1/2 lo !

K la . that's all for today . gtg =D

疲れている

nothing really happen much today . only fall asleep in chemistry class as it was quite boring . :X went to punggol plaza and had kfc with chenjun clarance and yixiang they all . then had chemistry remedial where we did pratical . then continued with dnt where we did pratical agn . yawn ! 累 累 累 ! went to clarance house and waited for him to bathe b4 we go to compass . he had the same dog as my auntie , and even the name is similar . such a coincidence right ?!! the after that dad came and fetch me home ! lucky ! was too fatigue to wait for bus .


PS :不要这样、这只会弄得大家都很累。如今我只能说对不起。我希望你能够坚持走下去！对不起 , 我知道我是个混蛋白 。ごめなさい！






Winter love lyric :
fuyu no youseitachi ga kagayaki maiorite kuru
nani mo suru koto nai kara egao no shashin kuchidzuketa
yakusoku shita eiga no nagai retsu ni futari shite mou narabu koto wa nai no?
dakedo kokoro wa soba ni iru kara
tomodachi ni mo miss you mou nido to modorenai

anata ga suki de aitakute KISU ga
hyaku oku no yuki wo tsutau no
doko ka de guuzen ni meguriaeru hi made
wasurenakute mo baby
sukidemo ii desu ka?
zutto wasurenai...

tatta hitoribocchi no jibun ni kidzuita shunkan
hontou no sabishisa ga ne afurete wa mata komiageru
hito wo aisu sonna omoi wo ima
taisetsu datte wasurenai tte omou
kono ADORESU wo nando kaete mo
sono koe mo yume mo watashi wo hanarenai no

toki ga nagarete chigau koishite mo
anata wo omoidasu deshou
deaeta unmei ga kawashita nukumori ga
"anata de yokatta" tte
kokoro kara ieru yo
itsuka aeru made...

mirai wa can't stop　yatte kuru
kanashii hodo hayaku forever
shiawase datte kizutsuita tte
dare ka wo aisuru toki just alive

anata ga suki de aitakute KISU ga
hyaku oku no yuki wo tsutau no
doko ka de guuzen ni meguriaeru hi made
wasurenakute mo baby
sukidemo ii desu ka?
zutto wasurenai...

English translation :
As shining winter fairies come floating down
I kissed your smiling picture because I had nothing else to do
At that long line outside of the movies, we vowed
To never stand in line here together again
But since my heart is next to yours
I still miss you even as a friend
But I can't turn back ever again

I love you, I want to see you again
With a kiss, expressed alongside ten billion snowflakes
Until the day that we happen to cross paths someplace
Baby, even if you forget me
Is it okay for me to still love you?
I'll never forget you

Since the moment that I was alone,
I've realised what true loneliness is
These overwhelming feelings in my heart that won't stop flowing out
Now, the way to love a person
Is so important that I think a person shouldn't forget it
No matter how many times my address changes
I'll never let go of that voice or that dream

Even if you love someone else as time flows by
I'll still remember you
Our destined meeting and the warmth we shared
I'm glad that it was you, and I can say it from my heart
Until we meet someday again

We can't stop the future from coming
The feeling of sadness can quickly become forever
Even if I get wounded when I'm happy
When I've fallen in love with a someone
Just alive

I love you, I want to see you again
With a kiss, expressed alongside ten billion snowflakes
Until the day that we happen to cross paths someplace
Baby, even if you forget me
Is it okay for me to still love you?
I'll never forget you .

just find this song nice . no other meaning :)

abandoned memories

im getting more and more dissapointed in myself . she had done nothing wrong to deserve this . and somehow i felt so heartbroken , maybe its sympathy . im really confuse ! on my way to the skool today , i kept thinking about you and the happy times we had . but its all over , and im the one who cause all this . finally know the meaning of you reap what you sow . appear to be fine in appearance but felt so pain in heart .



I CRAVE FOR POCKY !!!!!!! ARRRRRRRRRGHHHHHX

hectic LIFE

i felt so happy . finished the maths paper and i managed to do it :) well , today i think i could do well for the conversation but definitely not the reading . keep stumbling !! felt really dissapointed with myself for being nervous . just hope to get 7-8 marks and i will be contented .

today i told her everything . and maybe we shall end here .although you appeared to be allright , but im still worried . i could only say sorry , for hurting you and to start this relationship although i knew it would turn out to be likedat . just hope u could really stay strong and find some1 good enough to cherish you , love you and dote you . im just not good enuf for you . sorry !! i just couldnt bluff myself for not loving you anymore . i really feel happy to be with you , even its just a short period , yea . maybe you are right , but im just escaping my feeling . i know im a bastard , a real bastard , for hurting you and not puting myself in ur shoe . all i could say is ... sorry :(

gtg jogging now . bye ....

HAPPY YOUTH DAY

happy youth day guys ! hahas . well , today the day was quite well spend :) wake up on 11 and went compass to study with kevin , cj , dean and ashley they all . actually not really studying , only chionging maths . hahas . finished the examintaion papers and left with test paper . then went to play pool at hougang plaza with kevin , zankai , juinn liang , CJ , da sao and mabel . 3win and 3 lose . lose 2x to kevin and 1 to CJ :X hahas . nvm la . its ok . then went buangkok eat with kevin . and here i am , HOME !


PS : 如何跟你说 ? DEKINAI ? o.o

where is the faith

zzz . u can always believe me or not . i had said umpteen times that it was rumours . and for godsake i dunno how u knew it . but u should believe me . should'nt u ? if u still dun believe me , it's up to you . i have nothing to say .

TIRED

just came back . just now went to eat with mabel and kevin they all . hahas . went jalan kayu and ate prata . so FULL till now cant sleep . hahas . quite fun but i really should had stay longer . so bored here . lol . nights guys

CRAZE !

just back from compass . went to compass eat with kevin . it was so utter tedium . yawn . why cant we change our life ? woke up late today :X ! and was like i slpt so early ystd . must be too fatigued . then took lrt cos it was like alrdy 6.50 . but who knows ? some1 is later then i am ! =x hahahas . got 4 demerit today for unfinished eng homework . forgt to print the vocab out . zzz . totally crap ! then physic remedial is like whole lesson slacking . lols . INDRA dun even know i and yixiang went canteen to slack . about to go back saw ash and jo and we simply went back to the canteen again . LOL . then clarance came dwn too ! tdy DNT was fun too . Jas , JO and some POA ppl came to workshop pei us . lol . looking forward to tomorrow :)

PS : 我知道我不应该这样 . 但是这不是我想要的 , 而是我自己无法控制这一切的来临 .

trapped

back from jogging ! feel like dieing . why is this happening srsly ?!!!!! felt so bad and bastard !:x somethings really wrong with me . ARGGHHXX ! i missed you , been a wk since we last see each other . feel like seeing u right now ! or i shouldnt ? >.>
as for today was quite interesting and time really flew in a blink of eye . the same thing happen again , just like ystd and monday . really hope this could continue forever . well , i myself also dunno why ! :x . O's coming ! had to buck up . lets not talk bout tis =D